Hampton Style - August 17, 2007 - 24 hours in the hamptons

5:12 a.m.
Standing on the curb at Stephen Talkhouse, where I am manager and promoter. Catch an old limo to get home.

5:25
At home in East Hampton. Tip-toe around sleeping houseguests. Wonder why I gave my two deaf friends from high school the only room in the house that's quiet. Bad move. Sense of irony.

12:00 p.m.
Wake up grumpy. Boat we were going to take to Barcelona boat party in Sag Harbor caught on fire last night. It was supposed to be our "white trash" boat to promote our annual White Trash party later tonight at the Talkhouse.

12:30
Find boat that can accommodate all my houseguests. Race to the deli to buy beer and rush to dock.

1:30
Wait at dock for people even more tardy than us. I remember why I don't like boats. It's very hot at the dock.

2:15
We arrive at the Barcelona party. There must be 400 boats on the water. People on our boat are great but wish I had a dinghy to float around and say hello to everyone, kind of like window shopping. Remember losing my jeep, dog, and girlfriend at this same party years ago. It happens. I still have the jeep.

2:45
Jump in water to smoke cigarette. (No smoking on boat.) Get stung by a jellyfish.

3:45
Friends start heading boat towards Sunset Beach. Slight panic attack about getting back in time for party.

4:30
Home: quick change. Cut myself shaving. Clean my sneakers. Dump water out of old tub for the stripper later at party--and to cover it in mud. Steal Mom's truck and nephew's toys for props for party. Drop off tub at Talkhouse. Race to East Hampton Point for the party I promote there every week.

6:30
Buy tall boy beer and diapers at deli. Get strange look from the other people on line.

6:45
Watch sunset at East Hampton Point over dinner. Great sunset I'm sure, if my back weren't facing it. Steal knife from East Hampton Point to use as a prop at White Trash party.

8:45
Rush to Talkhouse. Get changed into my K-Fed outfit and meet my three Britney Spears dates. Lots of people and great music. Very happy. I am introduced to Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin, then feel like an idiot when I remember I'm in costume. It happens. Minor cut on hand from knife I stole. Call it karma.

5:00 a.m.
Night is over and the place is closed up. Wait on the curb, hoping an old limo might pass by.

Upcoming Shows
Suzanne Vega Band Saturday, August 25, 7pm * $70/$85 VIP	Yellowman Sunday, August 26, 8pm * $40
Steel Pulse Wednesday, August 29, 8pm * $110	Martin Sexton Sunday, September 2, 8pm * $85/$95 VIP
Toots and the Maytals Friday, September 7, 8pm * $100
The Stephen Talkhouse 161 Main Street, Amagansett 631-267-3117