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Police Blotter
Bad Boys, Bad Boys
A man in East Hampton was followed in a high speed chase by police after he didn't pull his car over. The man finally pulled over and then tried to explain to police that he didn't notice the flashing lights or the bullhorn command. Police smelled alcohol on the man and gave him a sobriety test, which he failed. He was arrested for driving while intoxicated. When police told him to put his hands behind his back, he heard those commands loud and clear.
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Leaf Blower
A man in East Hampton reported to police that his leaf blower had been stolen. Police are opening up an investigation. There have been a few leads so far, but some have just been people blowing smoke.
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No Fishing
A man in Montauk reported that his fishing set had been stolen. Okay, there are two things you don't do in Montauk - one is you don't mess with a man's fishing rod and the other is, YOU DON'T MESS WITH A MAN'S FISHING ROD!
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Hot-Tubber
A man in Southampton was caught hot tub hopping by a resident who stumbled upon the man enjoying a cigar inside a hot tub. When the resident confronted the man, he claimed he thought he was at his "Uncle's house." The cigar smoking man then got out of the hot tub and ran off.
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The Gas Man Argument
A gasoline attendant in East Hampton was pumping up a car with what was supposed to be $15 worth of gas. The attendant however, was distracted while talking to another person and went two dollars over the $15 limit. The driver asked the attendant to give her $5 after she gave him a twenty dollar bill because it was not her fault that the attendant was not paying attention. The attendant said he would only pay three. When the driver argued his position, the attendant became irate and gave the driver just a nickel while swinging the gas pump at the driver. The driver filed a report. Five bucks of gasoline is precious stuff these days.
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Traffic Violations
A man in Southampton was arrested after he failed to pay countless traffic violations. When he appeared in court and was asked why he didn't pay the tickets he said, "Because I hate paying my parking tickets."
Needless to say, the man paid up.
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Getting Rowdy
Two men in Sag Harbor were asked to leave a convenience store after he was caught opening and drinking a bottle of beer inside of the store. The men were charged with open container violations and left the store......without any beer.
- Compiled and Written by David Lion Rattiner
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