North Forkers And The H.O.V. Lane

You Don’t Need To Buy A Dummy, North Forkers Will Ride With You

By Phyllis Lombardi

A Suffolk County resident who was recently pulled over during rush hour on the Long Island Expressway was caught driving with a dummy. The driver, age 33, (and I’m smart enough not to name him), was accompanied, as he traveled the High Occupancy Vehicle lane, by a male companion. Trouble is, the companion was a mannequin. A dummy, if you will, used for CPR training. Of course, the HOV lane requires two or more breathing bodies per car during rush hours.

So here we are. One dummy with another. Couldn’t the guy find someone a bit more compatible? Or lively?

North Forkers would have no problem, that’s for sure. Why, our drivers would ask any number of interesting real people to ride along with them – and we don’t even have HOV lanes.

For example, there’s Carole Ann M. of Southold. She doesn’t want her last name printed because she might have to share her front seat companion. I can’t say I blame her. That dream companion is Andreas Arturo Garcia Menendez. Godfather Part III and Hill Street Blues Andy Garcia, of course. Just one question for Carole Ann. If you had Andy Garcia in your car, why in the world would you head for the HOV lane?

From Orient Point came the quick and candid response of driver Armand DeLuca. Who would you travel with, Armand?

“Nobody I can tell you about right now” was his swift reply. Actually, I could understand Armand’s answer. His devoted wife was standing close by his side. And I just knew she was listening carefully. It will be a long and happy union for her – married to such a discrete North Fork guy.

Speaking of long and happy unions, I asked my husband about his choice for front-seat friend (excluding me, obviously). If I had to speculate I’d say his choices would have included Willie Randolph, Harrison Ford or Hilary Clinton. (Yeah, we disagree on some things.)

But I was wrong. His choice for HOV conversation companion is Jim Rooney. Not a famous name, but a good name attached to a good person. Jim is the friend my husband talks to occasionally but hasn’t seen in years. He was part of “that old gang” my husband grew up with back in the last century.

I’ll let you in on a little something. This HOV companion will never happen. In our family, L.I.E. driving is up to me. My husband’s truck rarely finds its way even to Riverhead much less the HOV lane. Truly, truck and driver seem programmed to lumberyard or landfill only.

One guy who does considerable driving on the North Fork, is Riverhead’s David Paul. But there are times when his job requires traveling the L.I.E. No, David never resorted to a cardboard companion and yes, he’d enjoy asking several people to ride the HOV lane with him.

Way up on David’s list is author Tony Hillerman. David likes the southwest setting of Hillerman’s novels and he delights in the Navajo detectives, Joe Leaphorn and Jim Chee.

If Hillerman couldn’t go along with David, he’d ask Tom Stock, a local naturalist and poet. Tom has hiked the entire 125-mile Paumanok Path (from Rocky Point to Montauk), something David plans on doing. Tom and David can share sore-feet stories.

Finally, there’s Toni Berkoski. This Peconic driver has two teen grandchildren on the North Fork and they’re always going somewhere – but not with her. Toni recalls when Danielle and Michael were little and spent much more time with grandma. She thinks maybe if she could car-capture the teens she could have them all to herself for an hour or two. Toni, most grandmas sympathize with you. Try it and let us know if it works.

It should be pretty clear now that this dummy thing poses no dilemma for North Forkers. We’d invite very special people to ride along with us and we wouldn’t dream of compromising the law. One more thing. How comforting it is to know our North Fork lanes aren’t named HOV. They’re Apple, Bayview, Dogwood, High Meadow, Depot, Gull Pond. And Love..