Dan's Papers - October 5, 2007 - Inspirations by Emily J. Weitz

In our culture, people who are always willing to say "yes" are highly valued. When the boss needs something done, he or she is going to look for the employee who will be on top of it, no matter what else is going on in life. When the crew is out late at the bar, everybody loves the guy who keeps pushing the envelope, everybody adores the girl who never says die. But the truth is, sometimes all you really need is less. Maybe you need a little less responsibility at work. Maybe you need a few fewer drinks at the bar. Maybe you just need some time to yourself.

Last week was a wild one for me, between birthdays and potluck dinners, new jobs and old friends. And when Saturday night finally rolled around, all I wanted to do was kick back and relax. No late-night drinks with friends, no live music even if it was cheap, no nothing. I just wanted to regroup. So, my boyfriend and I holed up in the apartment. He mixed himself a martini and I poured myself a glass of wine. And we spent the rest of the evening drawing.

Now I am not an artist. I am the quintessential dabbler. I don't know what I'm doing and I don't claim to have any innate talent. But I really enjoy drawing. I recently found a medium that suits me fine, after many years of failure. The only thing I could paint with watercolors was sunsets. The only things I could draw with markers were horses and rainbows. But this past summer, when I was working at Hayground Camp, I discovered shadows and wrinkles and light through the medium of charcoal. I just really enjoyed it, and it's an incredibly relaxing thing to do.

So I turned off my phone, thanked the fates that the internet was down, and started drawing. I gazed at the arch in my foot, sketched it, played with the shadows, and worked with the picture for hours. As I got lost in the image, in the translation of my foot onto paper, I felt the stresses of my week melt away. I sipped on my cold blush wine and, pushing a strand of hair behind my ear, smudged my face with charcoal.

Suddenly, my lazy Saturday night had turned into something productive. It had become a night when I would turn inward, discover something about myself instead of a million things about everyone else. Instead of chatting about what's been going on in my life, it came out through my fingertips, up for the interpretation of - no one at all. That was it. This evening was not about having anything to show for it. It was not about seeing as many people as possible, guzzling as many cocktails as possible, taking in as much outside stimulus as possible. It was about kicking my feet up and noticing what had already been taken in. it was about processing. It was about recharging.

Of course, everything in life is a balance. Just as we need to learn how to say no to email, no to cell phones, no to dinner plans, no to cocktails, we also need to remember when to say yes. Once you've had your night in, you'll be more able to say yes to the things that matter, and you'll be able to give your whole self to them. By taking a Saturday night not to watch bad movies or flip through the channels, but to do something creative that allows you to explore yourself, you'll be better prepared for brunch on Sunday. You'll be saying yes to that new assignment on Monday. Because you have shown yourself that you know when to take on more and when to give yourself space.

Drawing, sculpting, writing, playing music, and painting are all creative ways to get your deeper feelings out without necessarily talking about them. Sometimes you need an outlet, but you don't need a response. Sometimes you need to express yourself, but not in words. That's when your no-pressure art time can be really beneficial. Start an art journal where you doodle or draw when you feel like letting go. It's a great way to spend productive time with yourself, and you'll feel the stresses of the world outside fall to the wayside.