Dan's Papers - August 22, 2008

I remember when the only two beauty potions on my grandmother's dressing table were cold cream and Vaseline. I can't recall the last time I saw a jar of cold cream, but I do know it was (and may still be) used for removing makeup and softening skin.

This got me thinking about how my grandmother stayed so soft and looked so good before the days of alpha hydroxy, La Mer, and hair products that promise remarkable (even if costly) results.

My grandmother only washed with Dove soap. She said that the advertisement was true: A bar of Dove has one quarter cup of cleansing cream. Then she would slather her face with cold cream, of which had seemed about an inch thick. By the time she went to bed her skin just seemed to have a soft sheen that we of today might call dewy.

I can still remember her sitting in front of her vanity mirror, the one with the three panels, brushing her hair as I would sit on the bed and watch her. I think this is how I learned to count to 100, as grandma said for healthy shiny hair and to get the natural oils from the scalp to the ends; 100 strokes was the magic number. When it came to washing her hair, she used only baby shampoo and said that other brands were full of detergent.

Each morning she would put Vaseline on her lips and her eyelashes. It was better than using ChapStick and she said it kept her lashes thick and soft. Something we might want to try before going for a swim. Vaseline will make anybody's lashes look darker and the water will bead up on your lashes and might stay better than waterproof mascara.

Grandma never indulged herself with professional manicures or pedicures, but when the skin on her hands and feet got dry and calloused she'd use a thick layer of Vaseline on the soles of her feet and the palms of her hands, then put on a pair of white socks or white cotton gloves.

Inside one of the vanity drawers was a product she couldn't resist: red nail polish. There, lined up like soldiers, were Revlon's three bestselling reds: Fire and Ice, Fifth Avenue Red and Cherries in the Snow. I can't tell you that I was able to tell the difference between these three reds, but I loved to watch her paint her nails. Sometimes she even left the moons of her nails unpolished and she would balance her pinkie on the vanity top for precision and accuracy.

When my grandmother removed that polish, she went into the kitchen where she kept the rest of her beauty products. The red polish, which she constantly wore, had the unwelcomed effect of yellowing her nails. So, she would soak them in lemon juice. And if they were still yellow, she'd add a bit of bleach so that they'd return to a fleshy tone of a pale, healthy pink. Afterward, she'd mix herself a glass of Knox Gelatin, because she said that it helps strengthens nails.

When she made sauce on Sundays, after finishing with garlic and onions, she'd squeeze a lemon over her fingertips to neutralize the odor. Then, she'd chew on a fresh twig of parsley, because it freshened her breath after tasting all of that sauce.

And by the end of a long day, she'd pour half a bottle of milk into a bath and then soak, because she said it softened and moisturized her skin. After bathing, she'd pat on some baby oil mixed with rosewater, making her smell so good.