Dan's Papers - August 3, 2007 - Dan's Papers' Kite Fly, August 5, Sagaponack

In a world of who's who, and see and be seen, of galas and fundraisers and charity bashes with red carpets and pink champagne, there is only one Hamptons' event that must not be missed. Once again, Dan's Papers brings you the annual kite fly. Sponsored by Southampton Town Park Department, this year's event will be held August 5, from 5 to 7p.m. at Sagg Main Beach in Bridgehampton. The decorum for this year's event is as follows:

Leave your high heels and checkbook behind. No donations are being sought and there are no valets to tip. The Southampton Town Parks Department has suspended all parking regulations for the evening, so not having a coveted and prized sticker for Sagg Main Beach's extensive parking lot is no excuse. To top it off, they have even kept all the facilities open, as well as supplying us with the finest lifeguards the Hamptons has to offer. All you are required to bring is a kite and a mentality to have some really good fun.

At the kite fly, for the most part, the younger generation rules absolute, and I know I have some very fond memories of previous year's kite flys.

During the first hour there will be live entertainment, including jugglers, face painters, caricaturists and a guest appearance by Sesame Street's very own Elmo, all there to leave you with a little memento for the memories.

Dan, it has been rumored, has some incredible omnipotent powers. In the same way that Wimbledon tennis tournament, held in London at the height of summer will undoubtedly bring a week of rain, so does Dan's kite fly bring glorious, though windy weather, no matter what the forecast.

At 6 p.m., a bullhorn will sound, announcing the beginning of the rigorous judging selection. Four judges, hand-picked by Dan, will scour the beach, leaving no kite un-admired. There are eighteen categories to be judged, including scariest kite, funniest kite, longest tail, youngest kite flyer, and many, many more. After the half-hour deliberating process, all contestants are invited back to the flight control center (little children on a tiny ego trip, anybody?) where the winners will be announced and prizes awarded. The winners will also see their names in print in the following week's issue.

Should Dan's command of the weather perhaps fail him, the kites will be judged on the ground. We will leave no kite behind! Whether it's a prizewinner or not, everybody gets included in the festivities. It's all about the taking part, right? At least that's what I was always told.

This year's categories:
Best nautical kite, Funniest kite, Highest flying kite, Longest tailed kite, Most beautiful kite, Most geometric kite, Most exotic kite, Most futuristic kite, Most graceful kite, Most natural kite, Most newsworthy kite, Oldest kite flyer, Youngest kite flyer, Scariest kite, Tiniest kite, Ugliest kite, Best colored kite, Funkiest kite, Lowest flying kite, Best home-made kite.