Dan's Papers - July 13, 2007 - Dangerous Decision

East Hampton Village has voted to leave the Parking Lot Falcons uncovered year 'round from now on. This is a very big decision and there are those who think it is a dangerous decision and will not go well.

Eight years ago, the Village ordered four parking ticket falcons and placed them at the entrances to the two main parking lots in the center of town. They would be in operation from Memorial Day to Labor Day. During those months, you'd drive up to right next to a falcon, press a button, and it would spit out a ticket indicating the time. The tickets didn't cost you anything, but said right on them that you should place them face up on your dashboard so when the parking lot police came around, it would show them how long you had been there. You weren't allowed to park in the lot for more than two hours, so if you did, the parking lot police would issue you a summons on your windshield.

After Labor Day that first year, special black leather hoods that zipped up were placed over the falcons' heads. You'd know the falcons were not issuing tickets, so you'd also know that the parking lot limits were no longer in effect. Stay as long as you wanted.

From the falcons' perspective, the hood provided them a much needed hibernation. They would sleep for nine months. And only just before Memorial Day, when the hoods were removed, would they have to wake up.

The people who had sold the Village the falcons said that removing the hood could sometimes result in the falcon exhibiting odd, sometimes aggressive behavior. So it was a good idea to do it gently and, just in case, have the police on hand. So that is what was done. Just before Memorial Day, the police were there, pistols at the ready, but the removal of the hoods went without incident.

That first year, the Mayor had predicted there would be 35,000 tickets issued in the three months. In fact, 80,000 were issued. It's a busy town.

The years went by. At the beginning of the fourth year, it was decided to remove the hoods on April 15 and then put them back on on November 30. The town had gotten even busier and the season now extended from three to six months. There was a need to now have the falcons awake for more months. I remember, that fourth year, half the town turned out in April --behind police barriers of course -- to witness the removal of the hoods. Again there were no problems.

Since that time, seven years later, the removal of the hoods have taken place every April 15. It's an anxious time, and when the falcons handle the change without incident, which they always have done, there is a small half hour party on the lawn of the Ladies Village Improvement Society property next door. Lemonade and cookies are served and this has become a tradition.

In each of these seven years, a representative of the Falcon Corporation in Beijing, Wi Fong Ju from the research department, has been on hand, flown in at company expense, to watch over the removal of the hoods and to see to it it is done carefully and correctly. The falcons, he explains, need their sleep. They were only manufactured to be up four months a year. They had another model, a newer model, that could do ten months a year. And here was East Hampton, keeping the cheaper model awake for six months a year. Wi Fong Ju, a nervous sort, has been attending the removal of the hood parties every April since the change. It has been a taxing experience for him. They spike his tea.

This fall, however, there will be no placing of the leather hoods and so next spring no removal of the hoods. In voting to keep the falcons awake all year round, the village knows it is taking chances, but they feel there is no choice. "Parking has become almost impossible, even in the wintertime," Village Mayor Larry Cantwell said. "We need the falcons all year round. We just have no choice."

He did point out that he was doing this to save the merchants from themselves. The merchants, during the hibernation season, have been in the habit of parking in the two downtown lots all day, rather than in the lot up by the YMCA building at the far end of the park. Parking in the two lots is closer. And doing so does take up space that a customer could use. The mayor said that when the customers give up trying to park and drive off, it hurts the whole town.

Wi Fong Ju, when we contacted him in Beijing and were able to tell him, through an interpreter, what had happened, said he was now very upset and would not be coming back to East Hampton come springtime anymore. He said they were taking a big chance.

Well, we shall see. Come November 30, there will be no village officials coming over with leather hoods to cover up the falcons as in the past. And therefore, there will be no removal of any hoods in April. The falcons will simply be required to work year round, indefinitely, without any sort of break.

Wi Fong Ju said he thought this was cruelty. He said his company could not be responsible for the behavior of the falcons from this point on and he was writing a letter to the Village to that effect. And so, if somebody loses a finger sometime trying to get a ticket out of the falcon's mouth, the Village was on its own.

We think he said finger. He might have said linger, meaning the button gets pushed and no ticket comes out making the motorist linger there, wondering what he should do.

Linger and finger, we found out, are spelled in Chinese, almost exactly in the same way. After this last conversation, Wi Fong Ju stopped returning our calls. We're on our own.