The Sheltered Islander

By Sally Flynn

The definition of fascism is an authoritarian system of government with intolerant views or practices.

Miss California lost her title because she had an opinion unauthorized by the governing media. She said she is personally opposed to gay marriage, but respects the rights of others to have a different view. It took the bureaucracy a while to figure out a way to fire her for her unpopular opinion, but they managed. I hope no one is fooled here. Her First Amendment rights were violated. She has the right to her opinion, and she has the right to say it out loud regardless of whether it's approved by the media or not. I applaud her for answering honestly about her position as opposed to giving a safe answer. We have the right to think and say anything we like, but we cannot impose our views on others.

I hate the way the media works to shape our opinions instead of just giving us the plain facts and letting us interpret them ourselves. Where is this generation's Huntley and Brinkley or Cronkite? The news is so filtered through corporate views, it's very hard to discern the truth.

On Shelter Island, there is a list of unauthorized opinions. And everything I just said only applies to the off-island world. There really are some things you cannot think here, and you'd better not say.

"We should build a bridge from Sag Harbor to Shelter Island." NO! This is a completely unauthorized thought that should never make it to your lips. I have heard that some people have uttered this thought in the past. But we'll never know who they are, or where their bodies are buried...

"We should have a McDonald's, or Pizza Hut or some of the big franchise stores here." No. Not allowed. We have everything we need - that is the official and approved opinion. Franchises are the spawn of the devil. Let one in and we'll have to let them all in... and in the same way Walmart's introduction wipe out all the trade in a town, our Ma & Pa stores will disappear. And we love our local stores more than we need a McDonald's. Besides, we can always take a ferry and drive 20 miles through thick traffic in the summer heat to Bridgehampton if we have a Big Mac Attack.

"People who can afford to build a heliport on their property should be allowed to do so." Nope. If we okay one, we'll have 10 in a few years. The sound of helicopters will cut through the cherished quiet of the Island like a hot blade through butter. At night, when sound really carries, it will wake everybody up. If that happens, the anti-helicopter forces will spring into action. Helicopters with harpoons through them will lie rusting in the sun on open fields, their blades stripped and used as canvases to paint homey scenes and sold by the roadside as folk art.

"A tattoo and piercing parlor would be great here." I actually overheard this in Pat & Steve's one day. A group of young people were reviewing everything they hated about the Island and what they thought the Island needed. A Tattoo and Piercing Parlor would go over here like the KKK opening a coffee shop across from the Obama Whitehouse.

I shared my opinion with the youngsters, and they gave me that First Amendment stuff about having the right to say anything they like. I reminded them that they also had the right to remain silent. I probably shouldn't have stabbed the one closest to me with a fork, but he already had bolts in his face, so I thought the fork punctures in his arm would sort of go with his theme of self mutilation for fun and profit.

"We need a combination bar/laundromat/deli for the single people and single parents on this Island." Actually, I think this is just my opinion. Of the six rentals over 10 years I've lived in, only two had washers and dryers. I believe if we had a combo bar/laundromat/deli, we could get the wash done, meet other singles and get dinner for the kids in one location. I know it's just a dream, like getting a movie theater here, but I've always dreamed big...

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