Dan's Papers - June 19, 2009 - Celebrating Pride in the Hamptons

The week of June 20 marks the 40th anniversary of the Stonewall uprising in Greenwich Village and New York's first Gay Pride march of 1969. The Hamptons is celebrating pride this and next weekend with its own events, including a panel on gay parenting, the "Pride in the Hamptons" fundraiser sponsored by Live Out Loud, and a talk by a man who spent more than a decade coming to terms with his sexuality.

That last rite of passage hardly sounds like news - many people wrestle with internal and external homophobia while coming out. But the man in question answers to a higher authority: He is Orthodox Rabbi, Steven Greenberg, and he'll give the keynote speech on "Gays and God" this Saturday at the Jewish Center of the Hamptons (JCOH).

The Yeshiva educated Rabbi is a Senior Teaching Fellow and the director of the Diversity Project at the National Jewish Center for Learning and Leadership in New York. He is the author of Wrestling with God and Men: Homosexuality in the Jewish Tradition; appeared in a documentary on Christianity and homosexuality entitled For the Bible Tells Me So, and was featured in Trembling Before G-d, a documentary about gay and lesbian Orthodox Jews.

In 1996, Greenberg was awarded a prestigious Jerusalem Fellowship, sending him to the holy city for two years to study educational issues and research religious attitudes towards sexuality. In 1999, he came out as the first openly gay orthodox rabbi, while adhering to Orthodox Judaism. Five years later came Wrestling with God, which explores biblical, rabbinic, medieval and contemporary Jewish responses to same-sex relationships.

On Saturday, Greenberg will speak on his personal journey as well those of other keepers of the faith. Following the talk is a cocktail reception hosted by the East End Gay Organization (EEGO). The entire event is free and open to the public.

The next morning, Sunday June 21 (Father's Day), EEGO is cosponsoring another event at the JCOH: an intergenerational panel on gay parenting, moderated by Jack Dresher, an M.D. and co-author of Gay and Lesbian Parenting, along with Deborah Glazer, PHD. In addition, JCOH Rabbi Sheldon Zimmerman will add his experiences of starting a Lesbian Gay Bisexual Transgender (LGBT) group at his former synagogue in Dallas. Panelists include a lesbian couple from the East End who have been together 36 years and have two children and four grandchildren; and a single lesbian mom with six-year-old twin girls, who is a social worker and a former adjunct professor at the School of Social Welfare at Stony Brook.

Next weekend's benefit, Pride in the Hamptons, is an all out party that won't address serious issues that particular evening. But the money it raises will support a life-threatening situation in the gay community: the vulnerability of gay teens to suicide. Teenagers have a high suicide rate compared to other demographics. For gay teenagers, that number is quadrupled. Even more shocking, gay and lesbian teens who are rejected by their families are 10 times more likely to attempt suicide compared to teens in general.

Founded nine years ago, Live Out Loud supports gay youth by connecting them with posivite, out role models and leaders in the LGBT community. It was the brainchild of Leo Preziosi, Jr., a former fashion designer turned special events coordinator from Deer Park. Never aspiring to lead a nonprofit for gay teens, Preziosi was the accidental activist.

"You hear about people who say, 'I read something and it changed by life,'" he said. "I thought that was malarkey. But then it happened!" he laughed. "I read the article in MetroSource magazine and it changed my life."

The article was about two gay teen boys, who, after years of being bullied and harassed, committed suicide.

"I looked at the story and thought, "I know exactly what this is about," said Preziosi. "That was the fall of 2000. Live Out Loud's first program was scheduled at the end of 2001."

Those programs, reaching thousands of teens, include panel discussions, speakers and workshops at high schools, colleges, and youth centers lead by highly accomplished members of the gay community successful in fields ranging from investment banking to entertainment. The organization also provides $2,500 scholarships to high school seniors who take leadership roles. This year, the awards went to two students who headed up their school's gay/straight alliances. "These are 17 and 18 year olds leading workshops, talking to and training principals and teachers," said Preziosi. "It blows my mind."

This year, the organization began the Homecoming Project, sending openly gay professionals back to their high schools. Dustin Lance Black, who won the 2008 Oscar for Best Original Screenplay for Milk, returned to his California high school. "A thousand people attended," said Preziosi. "Four kids came out in front of their classmates, to roaring applause. One kid said, 'I'm Mormon, and I just came out to my family.' Then he said, 'We really need to embrace our enemies because that's how we will move forward.' Everyone applauded - there wasn't a dry eye in the place."

The group's first Pride in the Hamptons event will be at the waterfront home of Bruce T. Sloane in East Hampton. Up for grabs in the silent auction is lunch with Michael Urie from Ugly Betty, and tickets to the Off-Broadway play, The Temperamentals, in which he's starring. There will also be a raffle of Martha Stewart gift baskets, and, according to Preziosi, "a DJ and dancing under tents right on the bay. What could be better?"

"Pride in the Hamptons" benefit sponsored by Live Out Loud. Saturday, June 27 6-8:30, East Hampton. Tickets start at $85 per person at the website www.liveoutloud.info.

Gays, Gods and Gay Parenting

Talk by Rabbi Steven Greenberg and cocktail reception: Saturday, June 20, 5:30 to 8 p.m.; Gay parenting panel, Sunday, June 21, 9:30 to 11 a.m

Both events are free; all are welcome. JCOH: 44 Woods Lane, East Hampton, 631-324-9858.