Mike Vilensky's Mini-Movie Reviews

Mr. Brooks
A detective follows a potential serial killer, a normal man with a dangerous alter ego. Kevin Costner and Demi Moore follow a possible blockbuster, another movie that will probably flop. I am tired of these "psychological" crime dramas starring established actors and attractive 40-something-year-old women. What kind of genre is that? A forgettable one.

Knocked Up
The 40-Year-Old Virgin director and team are back with what is poised to be this summer's comedy hit. But that team is not nearly as awesome as the starring couple, who can be credited as the hot alien from (cancelled) WB teen sci-fi series Roswell (okay, and now the hot girl from Grey's Anatomy) and the stoner from (cancelled) NBC teen comedy series Freaks & Geeks. Color them a comeback.

Day Watch
A Moscow-based hero fights evil and seeks a mysterious object that can rewrite history in this action-packed film that broke box office records in Russia. If he wins, could they rewrite this movie? Or maybe they'd prefer to rewrite the Cold War? Kidding! This beautiful and fascinating film is bound to be a cult hit.

Rise: Blood Hunter
If you have to subtitle your movie in order to explain it, then there's a problem. If you subtitle it something flashy like "Blood Hunter," you know it just ain't good enough to make money without marketing. Even fan favorite and Kill Bill villain Lucy Liu can't make this movie rise.

Gracie
e '70s, Gracie follows a New Jersey girl who fights to play on the boys' varsity soccer team. Her name sounds strangely biblical. She's from New Jersey. Make her go away. It's like a white-bred Bend it Like Beckham, but bad.

Crazy Love
A documentary on Burt and Linda Pugach's improbable relationship, Crazy Love is a love story that follows the extramarital affairs and subsequent throwing of acid in the eyes. Many moons of jail-time later, the subject couple is now happily married. Love is blind.

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