Police Blotter

Let This Be Your Official Warning

It's Memorial Day weekend folks, so if you think for even half a second that driving with some alcohol in your system is a good idea, then you need to get a brain scan. Police on the East End are fully aware that this is a big party weekend, so don't drink and drive.

Speaking of Which

Last weekend in East Hampton there were more than four reports of people that were arrested for driving while intoxicated.

Randomness?

A man in Sag Harbor randomly attacked a couple sitting on a bench. The attack was dropped to harassment because the injuries were extremely minor. The man apparently was never much of a tough guy.

What an Idiot

A young man in Southampton was arrested for stealing one can of beer from a convenience store. He was charged with petit larceny.

My Ladder!

A man who is 69 years old, yes we love that age also, reported to police that his ladder, flowerpots, oil fired pool heater worth $5,000, a driveway light and other items were missing from his yard.

Shelter Island

A raccoon was shot and killed on Shelter Island. Raccoons are known to carry rabies and are taken very seriously over there.

Hola

A man in East Hampton reported to police that somebody called his home demanding money because a relative of his hired him to illegally cross the Mexican border. The man does not have any such relatives and got off the phone, he did however report the incident to track down fraudsters targeting Hispanic families.

Want Some Pot?

Police arrested a drug dealer in Southampton who was selling marijuana in small packets. An officer observed a deal go down and immediately arrested the man.

Feeling Frisky

A man on the North Fork reported that a group of cats are continuously entering onto his property and rustling through his garbage. Animal control has been called and the man has purchased a new garbage bin.

Viagra

Some local male softball players in the Hamptons who play in a local league are being accused of using the male enhancement drug Viagra to gain an edge during games. Some are suggesting that they give extenz a try. You don't need a prescription for it.

- David Lion Rattiner

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