Those Plucky Little Tiny Countries In Europe

By Dan Rattiner

I do my best thinking in the shower. What came up this morning was the European Union. I think there's a glitch in it.

When we founded America, we gave a star on our flag to every state we could find that wanted to join up. There were thirteen of them. So we made thirteen stars.

When they founded the European Union, which was only a few years ago, they made a blue flag with a circle of twelve yellow stars in the center -- one for each of the countries that started it. But were there really only twelve? How many countries DID start it?

I am thinking in particular about some little, tiny countries that are tucked in among the big countries of Europe. Anybody familiar with geography knows of them. They are Monaco, which is surrounded by France; Andorra, which is nestled in the Pyrennes between France and Spain; Lichtenstein, bordered by Austria and Switzerland, and San Marino, entirely surrounded by Italy.

What's the story with these countries? Historically, in most things, they have gone along with just about everything the bigger countries next to them did. They sort of had to. None of them have standing armies. So I suspect they joined up. Or wanted to.

What did the founding fathers of the European Union say to them? You can come along if you want, but you don't get a star because you're not big enough? Perhaps they made a rule that if you wanted to come along you could, but to have a star you had to have more than, oh, let's see, 100,000 residents. Don't have that? Oh, gee. Were they kind about this? Or surly?

And if they did this, was that fair? In America, when we got more states joining up, we gave each one of them a new star on the flag. Even West Virginia. We would declare the old flag obsolete everywhere and make millions of new ones with the new star each time we did this.

In Europe, all sorts of other countries have now joined up, but with all of them, it's been "No Star for You." At least so far. But they can live in hope. The European Union is just getting started and those running it are very busy just now and perhaps have not gotten around to this topic yet.

But I really wonder about the original, embedded, tiny four. Have they given up their currency for the Euro? Are their borders open to outsiders within the European Union, as every place else in the Union is? And what do the Monaconians, Andorreans, Lichtensteinians and San Marinites think about all of this?

Next shower -- Switzerland.

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