Dan's Papers - April 25, 2008

Dear Dan,
After placing a call to the village Highway Department to ask when leaves could be put out for pick-up, I proceeded to do so, with permission. A wee later, I receive the following letter:

Dear Ms. Field,
I bought my property and built a house to enjoy the beautiful surroundings of the country area.
I would like to thank you for trying to make the appearance of the area so presentable. When I have a guest over this weekend, I am going to tell them how energetic you are (or stupid).
You put some leaves out off your property about two weeks ago, which made the roadway horrid. Then when the town picked up the debris you had out, it was less than twenty-four hours and you put more out to make the road look like a dump again. I pay a local contractor to remove my debris so I can enjoy the clean atmosphere out here.
I know now the intelligence level of a Local Yokel.
Please do not talk about us people who move out here and walk over the locals because number one the locals don't know how lucky they were to live in an area they have out here.

Since you lack the courage to put your signature at the end of your letter, my response will be to "Just a city idiot."

Dear Just a City Idiot,
First of all, as you may or may not know, the Village of Sag Harbor (not the town as you referred to it) provides this wonderful service paid for through our village taxes. If you do not wish to avail yourself of this service and instead prefer to "pay a local contractor to remove debris," that is your prerogative. One's "intelligence level" is not measured by whether or not one uses a service that is provided, however, if it were an accurate measuring tool, wouldn't that then make you the "stupid" one? As for your paranoid statement, "please do not talk about us people," you paint everyone with the same brush. I happen to have a wonderful family from the city as neighbors.
As for your "lucky" to live here statement, let me clear that up for you. There was nothing "lucky" about it. My parents came here through Ellis Island in hopes of a better life. Instead they stepped into the Great Depression. They sacrificed and struggled and did without the most basic necessities in life such as electricity, running water, heat, food, job and no automobile. It was through their unending determination of the human spirit to survive that made it possible. Luck had nothing to do with it. There was nothing "lucky" about it, just years and years of endless hard work and sacrifice. The dues have been paid.
In this time of war, sagging economy, loss of thousands of jobs, skyrocketing energy prices, I find it very sad that you find a pile of leaves on the side of the road as something to be concerned about.
Your letter to me suggests that you are an angry person. Might I suggest a little relaxation technique...raking? You might enjoy the "country area" even more. Speaking of raking, I must get back to mine. Round three coming up! Peace.

Way to go Yolanda! - DR

Dear Dan,
The old and evil cruel ways still exist in Sag Harbor.
It's unbelievable but it is true. At Spring Farm the horrible cruelty to ducks and pheasants has been going on for far too long and it's time to put a stop to this barbaric way of treating birds. This is no hunt and certainly no sport. I am tired of rescuing these poor birds with their bodies riddled with bullets. Many of them drag themselves all the way to my property too weak and wounded to be able to fly. Many with led poison in their bodies. They have all had one of their back toes cut of. All of them escapees from Spring Farm. It is high time to stop these heartless and cruel owners from running this kind of business. If they must have a shoot they can do this with clay pigeons.
Spring Farm is more like a concentration camp. It's riddled with wounded and dead birds all over the area. It's dirty and littered with garbage and plastic and here they raise these poor birds from eggs. No living thing should have to live like this. The place is also a very dangerous traffic hazard, as one constantly has to swerve for the poor hurt birds in the road. I thank God that most of these old cruel ways are gone and more of them are disappearing every day as people just won't put up with this kind of treatment of birds. The next one to be gone should be Spring Farm.
Shame on you!

If true, this is awful. - DR

Dear Dan,
I want to express my thanks to governor Paterson and all the people who work to save the Long Island Sound. I cannot think of a better way to send my thanks then through your paper. So if you would be so kind as to print this. Thanks for saving my life!
And the lives of all creatures big and small
That live in and around me!
Your friend for life!

Governor Paterson has saved us from the "evil" Governor Spitzer.

Dear Dan,
I just wanted to thank Dan Rattiner and Jim Marquardt for their insightful and kind review of my book "Take No Prisoners" in the March 28 issue of Dan's Papers, which you were kind enough to send me here in Atlanta.
I hope to be back in Bridgehampton in mid-May and look forward to reading the paper regularly then.
Please wish Dan the best of luck on his new book
Best Wishes...

Marv Davis
Managing Partner
Grisanti, Galef & Goldress
Sandy Spring, Ga.
Via e-mail