Dans Hamptons

Having curly hair is a curse. Yeah, I said it. It's an awful curse. It's not fun, interesting or exotic. It's an incredible hassle. That's what people don't get about curly hair. Those with straight hair are probably going crazy right now thinking things along the lines of "this guy has no idea what he's talking about," or "how could naturally curly hair possibly be a curse?" The reason they're so surprised is because I'm breaking a code, of sorts.

Most people with curly hair go through their lives with people telling us how lucky we are or how great our hair is. As a result, we keep our mouths shut. We're polite, we smile, say thank you and quickly change the subject. The reason for this is because the world of curly hair is a dark, unforgiving one in which you have no choice but to sacrifice the most valuable things in life - time, close loved ones and sleep - to merely be able to look like an acceptable, hygienic human being.

To understand the problem with having curly hair, you have to know the basic curl. It seems innocent, sometimes even cute or cuddly, but in reality, curls are cranky yet delicate creatures that hide behind the facade of hanging casually. The smallest disturbance to a curl such as pressure, liquid, or even a stiff wind can send it into a frenzy of frizz, tangles and snarls beyond repair. What makes matters worse is that curls are a very tight community. Like natural chain-mail they interweave and inter-loop, binding together as a tight family. When something disrupts one, the entire community feels it, but many come to the aid of their fallen comrade.

There is no solution for this. The best one can do in terms of damage control is by trying to separate those not involved from the snarl of the upset. Combs and brushes only dissect the curls, leading to more frizz and more problems. The only answer is punching the reset button and starting from scratch. This means a shower. Every. Single. Day. Not that being clean is a problem, but it means that rolling out of bed Sunday morning and running out for some bagels or heading to the beach club is not an option. Not, at least, without pressing the reset button.

And I'm just a guy. Granted I have longer hair than most men, but I don't put nearly the time or the energy into my hair that most curled women do. I don't use gel, mousse, spray, clips or a blow dryer. Many people with curly locks are forced to use all of the above.

There's no consistency in this world of curl either. People with straight hair can count on the same thing every day. It will fall the way it did yesterday and again tomorrow. With curls, they change every day, unpredictably. A good haircut is often good for only one day, because the person cutting the hair can do nothing but guess at how the hair will group and fall on most days. But there's another twist (forgive the choice of word) on curly hair. It grows.

The curls start in the follicle. As they grow, the angle from which the hair comes out of the head changes depending on where in the curl cycle they are. As a result, people with curly hair have hairdos that start in different places depending on the week. For many, there are angles that will never be manageable or look good and there's nothing they will ever be able to do about it.

So for the straight-haired people out there, please keep in mind, next time you see someone with curly hair, whether or not it looks good, be mindful of the curse. Remember that it's a life of gambling on the edge of disaster and sacrifice. If you really must talk about curly hair, then try to give us a meaningful compliment like "I love your work," or "Wow, nice job today." We're not saying that you have it easy, we're just saying that you don't understand and you never will.

Now that you've had a peek into the world of curly hair, do you still wish you had it? You should, we wouldn't trade it for a second.