Dan's Papers - April 4, 2008

When my sister asked me to be her maid of honor, I said yes. Prior to this, I'd only been to two weddings - one, where I was a guest sans date, and the other (my brother's wedding) where I was a bridesmaid of "courtesy," being that my family lives by the "blood is thicker than wine" motto. I was happy to accept the coveted role of maid of honor for my sister, since I figured it would be memorable and help forge strong bonds between us, but I had no idea what to do.

My sister, Katie Cooper, accepted Jason Alexander's proposal of marriage in February of 2007. The wedding date is set for April 19, 2008 and will be held at a beautiful neoclassical Georgian mansion (formerly a du Pont mansion) now called The de Serversky Center in Upper Brookville, New York. Although we've watched the show countless times, I never thought my sister to be a "Bridezilla." For those unfamiliar with it, the show is aired by the WE television network. Cameras follow brides who don't think that spray painting 100 doves gold is even the teeniest bit "over the top," and demand floral arrangements that leave several countries bereft of flora. And I still don't think she's a bridezilla with less than two weeks to go until the big day. As a first grade teacher, Katie is used to being organized and comfortably in control of the people and things around her. So I began my journey by becoming quite the fan of "to do" lists.

On my first to do list were the basics: help Katie with bridal gown selection, choose bridesmaid gowns, book the reception hall, call the church (which church? Wait, what do you mean he's not Catholic?), book the band, book photographer/videographer, eat at every cakery along the way to discover the latest technological advances in strawberry mousse, yellow cake and butter cream icing combinations. It seemed like my role was evolving into more of a cheerleader, urging my sister on from the sidelines to get these things done. As my to do lists became increasingly long and complex, someone mentioned to me, "What are you planning for the bridal shower and bachlorette party?" Thankfully, I was in good communication with the other bridesmaids who have a lot of experience planning showers and went on with my action plan.

Since most of Cooper's friends are from out of state, we consolidated the events into one weekend. The person who was the true saving grace in this whole ordeal was my aunt, Donna England. "Victoria, we'll have it at my house and we'll make the food. Just be sure the other bridesmaids make the wishing well." Wishing well? I had no clue what that was but apparently, it's "old fashioned," and it's a well (a wicker laundry basket decorated with pretty ribbon) and guests bring small kitchen appliances like a vegetable peeler or can opener. Okay, that was easy. Now on to the invitations and the dreaded task of what's the theme, who's invited, and should it be regrets only or RSVP? I got to work. I got the invitations. I got the addresses and stamps but my head was still spinning as to what to do for Katie's bachelorette party. Katie is a very traditional woman. Her taste is simple, formal and she has an appreciation for the finer things in life like rose champagne and raspberries. In her words, "No, tacky strippers!" Okay, that was out. What about theatre? Dinner and drinks in the Manhattan and a little Broadway would suffice it. But I couldn't ask the girls to shell out that kind of money, around $200 for the night, each. It would have to be somewhere between the worlds of classy and trashy and before I knew it, I was on the phone with Roxy from Lucky Cheng's, the drag queen capital of the world, booking the date. Not done yet. A limo and the secret weapon, cocktails in the Rise Bar in the Ritz Carlton post drag show.

Guests were excited when they heard where we were going and when Katie found out in the limo ride, she cracked a smile, too. The show was a success and funny, especially when Katie told the drag queen what her fiancé did. "He's a luxury yacht captain."

"Girl, that's the whitest thing I've ever heard." I was happy to see people laughing and afterward at the Rise Bar in the Ritz, which has the most spectacular view of New York Harbor, the bridges and Statue of Liberty, our group just kept saying, "From the pits to the Ritz!"

After the shower and bachelorette party had passed, I sighed a long breath of relief. Now, as the maid of honor all I have to do is send dresses, make a slideshow, send wedding invites, making seating chart, write speech for rehearsal dinner...